I know it's been posted in other UMC blogs and it's been a hot subject...
The reappointment of Rev. Ann Gordon as Rev. Drew Phoenix in Baltimore.
I don't know how to make of this, or think of it.
So maybe if you share your insights and thoughts, it can only help me, right?
Showing posts with label Reflections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Reflections. Show all posts
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Finally, a Step Forward
Today I am (finally) a certified candidate.
It was kind of intimidating when I walked into the room with all the people waiting for me. They asked me all sorts of questions based on what I wrote, and I answered them as best as I could, at times, I felt I may be saying too much and that it was going to hurt me, like my Wesley Newsletter incident.
As they told me that they unanimously approved me, they gave me four affirmations.
One of them was that they enjoyed my honesty and found it refreshing and asked me to never let it water down.
I kind of thought that was funny. I told that too my wife on the drive home. She said that some of our college students like me because I'm refreshingly honest. I found that even funnier.
I never knew I was "refreshingly honest." I still don't think I am. But I do know who I am, and I like it. (I don't know if that sounds conceited). I like me. Sometimes.
And I don't like changing who I am for others just for the sake of being liked.
I don't like holding back what I have to say just for the sake of people not liking me or people getting offended. Over the years, I have gotten better at what to say and what NOT to say.
Someone is always going to get offended at what my opinion may be. But if I have to always worry about offending someone, I won't ever be able to be me. And I like being me. (sometimes).
They also suggested that I look into being appointed as a local pastor. I expressed the desire (and the need) for our students at my church to partake in Communion, but in a way they understand what it means. They have to do Communion with the adults and it's in a language they can't understand fully (Korean language with Theology sprinkled on it). So Communion to them has become something that they just go through the motions of and not understand the importance and the wonder of it all.
I'm a step closer to ordination, yet it all seems so far away.
It was kind of intimidating when I walked into the room with all the people waiting for me. They asked me all sorts of questions based on what I wrote, and I answered them as best as I could, at times, I felt I may be saying too much and that it was going to hurt me, like my Wesley Newsletter incident.
As they told me that they unanimously approved me, they gave me four affirmations.
One of them was that they enjoyed my honesty and found it refreshing and asked me to never let it water down.
I kind of thought that was funny. I told that too my wife on the drive home. She said that some of our college students like me because I'm refreshingly honest. I found that even funnier.
I never knew I was "refreshingly honest." I still don't think I am. But I do know who I am, and I like it. (I don't know if that sounds conceited). I like me. Sometimes.
And I don't like changing who I am for others just for the sake of being liked.
I don't like holding back what I have to say just for the sake of people not liking me or people getting offended. Over the years, I have gotten better at what to say and what NOT to say.
Someone is always going to get offended at what my opinion may be. But if I have to always worry about offending someone, I won't ever be able to be me. And I like being me. (sometimes).
They also suggested that I look into being appointed as a local pastor. I expressed the desire (and the need) for our students at my church to partake in Communion, but in a way they understand what it means. They have to do Communion with the adults and it's in a language they can't understand fully (Korean language with Theology sprinkled on it). So Communion to them has become something that they just go through the motions of and not understand the importance and the wonder of it all.
I'm a step closer to ordination, yet it all seems so far away.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Moving On
It's been a while since I've updated.
Tomorrow, I have my meeting/interview with dCOM.
I'm just glad that I'm finally getting the ball moving on the whole ordination process.
As I evaluate my life and my calling, I find myself wanting to move away from youth ministry. I still love working with the youth, but I think I'm just preparing myself for the next part of my life.
If I become a senior pastor of a congregation, I'd still make sure that our youth ministry will be a strong part of our church.
But, this is not really my choice, is it?
I will go wherever I'm called to go.
Tomorrow, I have my meeting/interview with dCOM.
I'm just glad that I'm finally getting the ball moving on the whole ordination process.
As I evaluate my life and my calling, I find myself wanting to move away from youth ministry. I still love working with the youth, but I think I'm just preparing myself for the next part of my life.
If I become a senior pastor of a congregation, I'd still make sure that our youth ministry will be a strong part of our church.
But, this is not really my choice, is it?
I will go wherever I'm called to go.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Korean Congregations Killing Pastors
Yes. That's how I strongly feel.
Korean congregations, for the most part, are not pastor friendly. It's ridiculous of what they expect and want from their pastors.
There's no room for error nor grace.
Many Korean pastors I know sacrifice their families to run their ministries. That's a ridiculous concept. Some pastors I know even glorify their decision. In my opinion, that is NOT the way to do things, because ministry starts at home. But the more I am involved in Korean congregations, the more I see that, for the majority of the Korean pastors, there is no room to serve both family and ministry because of the demands that the people put on them.
This is what I feel, that the church knows they are not perfect, but they don't really want to be. They'd rather see it in their leader.
The congregation drives around in a BMW. The pastor bought a volvo, the congregation complained that a volvo is too pricey of a car for the pastor to drive. if the pastor has enough money to buy a volvo, the church is paying the pastor too much.
The congregation carry designer purses such as Coach etc. The pastor's wife carries around a real Louis Vuitton and the congregation believes that the pastor's wife should carry fake bags at best.
The congregation, expects, no demands, that they have vacation time from their jobs. But refuses to see why their pastor needs to take vacations.
I'm actually afraid to go and ask how many weeks of vacation I get in a year, since I'm not appointed and a local church hire.
Even more to actually say I'm going on vacation because the senior pastor doesn't take one (WHICH IS FREAKING RIDICULOUS!!!!!!), either because he can't nor he doesn't want to (WHICH IS STILL FRIGGIN RIDICULOUS!!!).
This is why many second generation Korean pastors leave the Korean congregation or the ministry altogether, because people should not and cannot function in such conditions.
Korean pastors with healthy families seem rare and that is saddening.
I know that there are problems within all cultures and congregations. This is just one of the bigger ones in my context and I wish there were ways to teach the Korean congregation that pastors are human, pastors make mistakes, pastors have the same (similar) needs and desires as everyone else.
A part of me is praying that after I get ordained, I will not have anything to do with the Korean church. This thought saddens me.
Korean congregations, for the most part, are not pastor friendly. It's ridiculous of what they expect and want from their pastors.
There's no room for error nor grace.
Many Korean pastors I know sacrifice their families to run their ministries. That's a ridiculous concept. Some pastors I know even glorify their decision. In my opinion, that is NOT the way to do things, because ministry starts at home. But the more I am involved in Korean congregations, the more I see that, for the majority of the Korean pastors, there is no room to serve both family and ministry because of the demands that the people put on them.
This is what I feel, that the church knows they are not perfect, but they don't really want to be. They'd rather see it in their leader.
The congregation drives around in a BMW. The pastor bought a volvo, the congregation complained that a volvo is too pricey of a car for the pastor to drive. if the pastor has enough money to buy a volvo, the church is paying the pastor too much.
The congregation carry designer purses such as Coach etc. The pastor's wife carries around a real Louis Vuitton and the congregation believes that the pastor's wife should carry fake bags at best.
The congregation, expects, no demands, that they have vacation time from their jobs. But refuses to see why their pastor needs to take vacations.
I'm actually afraid to go and ask how many weeks of vacation I get in a year, since I'm not appointed and a local church hire.
Even more to actually say I'm going on vacation because the senior pastor doesn't take one (WHICH IS FREAKING RIDICULOUS!!!!!!), either because he can't nor he doesn't want to (WHICH IS STILL FRIGGIN RIDICULOUS!!!).
This is why many second generation Korean pastors leave the Korean congregation or the ministry altogether, because people should not and cannot function in such conditions.
Korean pastors with healthy families seem rare and that is saddening.
I know that there are problems within all cultures and congregations. This is just one of the bigger ones in my context and I wish there were ways to teach the Korean congregation that pastors are human, pastors make mistakes, pastors have the same (similar) needs and desires as everyone else.
A part of me is praying that after I get ordained, I will not have anything to do with the Korean church. This thought saddens me.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Rules of Engagement
Okay. There are certain public bathroom etiquettes that I as a man follow, but so should every other men in the world.
1. No Talking While Peeing
What I mean by that is, when I'm on the urinal, I don't want to be talking to anyone. Especially if I do not know you. If you have something to say, you can wait a couple of seconds until we are completely out of the bathroom. If you must get it off your chest immediately, then wait a second until we are both done and washing our hands. No talking while peeing. It's just weird.
2. The Every Other Urinal Rule
So if it's just me and you in the bathroom, and there are 3 or more adult urinals, then one urinal should serve as a buffer.
If I'm already on the urinal, and you come in, and it's just me and you, you should not go and use the urinal directly next to me unless A) it's the only other urinal B) the other urinal is a child's urinal. Other than that, if it's just me and you in the bathroom, and there's more than 3 urinals, keep at least one urinal between us. Preferably, I'd want us to be in the opposite ends of the bathroom, but that's not necessary.
3. No Straying of Eyes
Your eyes should only be in 1 of the 3 positions, and there is NO other option.
You should be 1) looking down into YOUR urinal, 2) looking straight into the wall, or 3) looking straight above you.
In no way should your eyes be wandering left to right. There's no reason for it to. If you want to talk to me while peeing, please refer to rule number 1. Just down, straight or straight up. Your eyes should be no where else.
4. For the Love of God, wash your hands!
5. Oh, and flush the toilet/urinal after yourselves! Geez!
I'm sure there is more.
Ah.
this happened to me once
6. No Hand Shaking in the bathroom.
Please do not offer your hand for a shake in the bathroom at any time, ESPECIALLY, before you wash your hands. Actually, no physical contact at all would be preferred in the bathroom. There's no reason for me to hug you or shake your hand in the bathroom. None whatsoever.
That's it for now.
Yes, I don't like public bathrooms.
Care to add anymore?
1. No Talking While Peeing
What I mean by that is, when I'm on the urinal, I don't want to be talking to anyone. Especially if I do not know you. If you have something to say, you can wait a couple of seconds until we are completely out of the bathroom. If you must get it off your chest immediately, then wait a second until we are both done and washing our hands. No talking while peeing. It's just weird.
2. The Every Other Urinal Rule
So if it's just me and you in the bathroom, and there are 3 or more adult urinals, then one urinal should serve as a buffer.
If I'm already on the urinal, and you come in, and it's just me and you, you should not go and use the urinal directly next to me unless A) it's the only other urinal B) the other urinal is a child's urinal. Other than that, if it's just me and you in the bathroom, and there's more than 3 urinals, keep at least one urinal between us. Preferably, I'd want us to be in the opposite ends of the bathroom, but that's not necessary.
3. No Straying of Eyes
Your eyes should only be in 1 of the 3 positions, and there is NO other option.
You should be 1) looking down into YOUR urinal, 2) looking straight into the wall, or 3) looking straight above you.
In no way should your eyes be wandering left to right. There's no reason for it to. If you want to talk to me while peeing, please refer to rule number 1. Just down, straight or straight up. Your eyes should be no where else.
4. For the Love of God, wash your hands!
5. Oh, and flush the toilet/urinal after yourselves! Geez!
I'm sure there is more.
Ah.
this happened to me once
6. No Hand Shaking in the bathroom.
Please do not offer your hand for a shake in the bathroom at any time, ESPECIALLY, before you wash your hands. Actually, no physical contact at all would be preferred in the bathroom. There's no reason for me to hug you or shake your hand in the bathroom. None whatsoever.
That's it for now.
Yes, I don't like public bathrooms.
Care to add anymore?
Saturday, May 5, 2007
First Love...
Sometimes, I'm so busy in pursuing what I need to do, I often forget my first love.
Recently, praise and prayer just seemed to be dry. And if it feels dry to me, I'm sure that my leaders and my students can feel it to.
When it comes to picking songs for praise, I find myself being frustrated. All the songs sounds the same, we've done these songs over and over, there is nothing new.
I never felt that way before.
When I pray in prayer groups, it takes a long time for me to actually get the words out.
Then, this morning, lying on the couch and looking out the window, it hit me, I forgot my first love.
I forgot that when we sing praise, it's singing a love song to God, for God. It shouldn't really matter that the songs sound the same or we've done it over and over. It's for God. As long as our hearts in the right place, and God focused... that's all the matters.
In the past two weeks, I've been so busy, I forgot to just spend time with the Bible and read and meditate.
It's scary how pastors are so caught up in the work of the church and helping others with their spiritual lives, that they completely ignore their own.
I'm glad that staring out the window and seeing the trees and the sky, I had this somewhat epiphany. I picked up on Jeremiah where I left off too long ago.
Came across this verse:
Although our sins testify against us, O Lord, do something for the sake of your name
Jeremiah 15:7a
It just reminded me the faithfulness of God. That God will remain faithful to me and my church, even though I have been unfaithful to Him over and over.
I laid back down on the couch, and stared out the same window.
I was reminded that I briefly lost track of my first love.
I fell asleep on the couch and woke up hearing my wife (who has a beautiful voice) and her friend (who's visiting) practicing some praise songs.
I woke up feeling rested and renewed.
God is good.
Recently, praise and prayer just seemed to be dry. And if it feels dry to me, I'm sure that my leaders and my students can feel it to.
When it comes to picking songs for praise, I find myself being frustrated. All the songs sounds the same, we've done these songs over and over, there is nothing new.
I never felt that way before.
When I pray in prayer groups, it takes a long time for me to actually get the words out.
Then, this morning, lying on the couch and looking out the window, it hit me, I forgot my first love.
I forgot that when we sing praise, it's singing a love song to God, for God. It shouldn't really matter that the songs sound the same or we've done it over and over. It's for God. As long as our hearts in the right place, and God focused... that's all the matters.
In the past two weeks, I've been so busy, I forgot to just spend time with the Bible and read and meditate.
It's scary how pastors are so caught up in the work of the church and helping others with their spiritual lives, that they completely ignore their own.
I'm glad that staring out the window and seeing the trees and the sky, I had this somewhat epiphany. I picked up on Jeremiah where I left off too long ago.
Came across this verse:
Although our sins testify against us, O Lord, do something for the sake of your name
Jeremiah 15:7a
It just reminded me the faithfulness of God. That God will remain faithful to me and my church, even though I have been unfaithful to Him over and over.
I laid back down on the couch, and stared out the same window.
I was reminded that I briefly lost track of my first love.
I fell asleep on the couch and woke up hearing my wife (who has a beautiful voice) and her friend (who's visiting) practicing some praise songs.
I woke up feeling rested and renewed.
God is good.
Sunday, April 29, 2007
I Will Find Rest In You
It's been an exhausting and draining week.
I started going to the dawn prayer service at 530am, Monday through Saturday.
This weekend (and tonight) is our Youth Seminar 2007. (We couldn't think of a better name).
The Korean church has thing called Father School and Mother School and it's basically a workshop and seminars and how to be more loving parents.
I felt that parents shouldn't do all the work, so we are doing Youth Seminar, which is basically how to be more loving sons and daughters.
Tomorrow night, or rather, tonight, is the big finale. We want all the parents to come and have them worship together with the kids, which rarely happens in the Korean church due to the language.
I don't know how I will last through tomorrow.
I'm up preparing things for tomorrow, like a video presentation of the first two days to show parents what we did. I'm also adding finishing touches on the youth sermon, the young adult sermon and the Family Worship sermon. All three different sermons.
And to top it all off, on Monday, I get to go to church at 530am.
A part of me says, I should take Monday off, because Monday is essentially my only day off.
But I made a promise to God and to myself that I will faithfully and diligently attend the early morning service for 40 days.
Besides, I don't want to get into the habit of thinking that my Sabbath should be a sabbath from everything, even God. I tend to do that a lot, and I know that many pastors do too.
Just because I take a day off from church, doesn't mean I take a day off from God. In fact, because I am not concentrating on anything church-related, I should take the free time and be with God.
Yes, I am tired and exhausted.
But I will find rest in the Lord.
I started going to the dawn prayer service at 530am, Monday through Saturday.
This weekend (and tonight) is our Youth Seminar 2007. (We couldn't think of a better name).
The Korean church has thing called Father School and Mother School and it's basically a workshop and seminars and how to be more loving parents.
I felt that parents shouldn't do all the work, so we are doing Youth Seminar, which is basically how to be more loving sons and daughters.
Tomorrow night, or rather, tonight, is the big finale. We want all the parents to come and have them worship together with the kids, which rarely happens in the Korean church due to the language.
I don't know how I will last through tomorrow.
I'm up preparing things for tomorrow, like a video presentation of the first two days to show parents what we did. I'm also adding finishing touches on the youth sermon, the young adult sermon and the Family Worship sermon. All three different sermons.
And to top it all off, on Monday, I get to go to church at 530am.
A part of me says, I should take Monday off, because Monday is essentially my only day off.
But I made a promise to God and to myself that I will faithfully and diligently attend the early morning service for 40 days.
Besides, I don't want to get into the habit of thinking that my Sabbath should be a sabbath from everything, even God. I tend to do that a lot, and I know that many pastors do too.
Just because I take a day off from church, doesn't mean I take a day off from God. In fact, because I am not concentrating on anything church-related, I should take the free time and be with God.
Yes, I am tired and exhausted.
But I will find rest in the Lord.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
My Father
For those that do not know, my father is a pastor.
Forgive me for saying this, and I know this is not the point, but i think I am a better pastor than he is. Sure, he has the experience. But I'm more charismatic. I'm smarter. I'm wittier. I'm handsomer.
Haha.
Where I'm going with this post is that there is something my dad does that I need to model myself after more than anything, and that's his prayer life.
My dad has always been praying and fasting as long as I could remember.
He has done 4 40 day fasting. I think if you add up all the days he fasted in his lifetime, it'll be more than 365 days. That's just crazy!
But, because my dad prays, we see God working through him and our family. When we were living in Santa Barbara, due to unnecessary (and unfair) politics, my dad had to resign from the church he was serving. I didn't know that much back then, being only 12 years old. But I'm sure my dad panicked, because he had a family to feed and no income.
I look at my financial situation, and i start getting nervous and anxious, and we ain't even have a kid yet.
So my dad did what he knows best, turn to God in prayer and fasting.
One day, my dad got a phone call from someone in Los Angeles who heard my dad preach at a revival. The person said that he feels he needs to give my father $2000 a month for the next few years.
So when I look at my spiritual life, I see that I am undisciplined and tactless.
I recently read Adam Hamilton's Unleashing the Word and it inspired me to be more prepared for my sermon preparation. And I have. I'm disciplining myself more, and it is showing in me and in our ministry.
I strongly believe that prayer needs to be the most important aspect of my ministry. And I embarrassingly admit that I just don't pray enough.
So for the next 40 days (not including Sundays), with 6 prayer requests, I am heading out to our Early Morning Prayer Service at 530am. Though everything is in Korean, they leave us at least half an hour after the brief message to pray. And in Korean style, everyone prays out loud. You have to experience this to know what I'm talking about.
I went this morning. My body is not used to getting up so early, but it will adjust.
And right now, it's 1230am. I should hurry up and go to bed so that I do not sleep in.
I think this is a good start to becoming more disciplined in my spiritual life.
Forgive me for saying this, and I know this is not the point, but i think I am a better pastor than he is. Sure, he has the experience. But I'm more charismatic. I'm smarter. I'm wittier. I'm handsomer.
Haha.
Where I'm going with this post is that there is something my dad does that I need to model myself after more than anything, and that's his prayer life.
My dad has always been praying and fasting as long as I could remember.
He has done 4 40 day fasting. I think if you add up all the days he fasted in his lifetime, it'll be more than 365 days. That's just crazy!
But, because my dad prays, we see God working through him and our family. When we were living in Santa Barbara, due to unnecessary (and unfair) politics, my dad had to resign from the church he was serving. I didn't know that much back then, being only 12 years old. But I'm sure my dad panicked, because he had a family to feed and no income.
I look at my financial situation, and i start getting nervous and anxious, and we ain't even have a kid yet.
So my dad did what he knows best, turn to God in prayer and fasting.
One day, my dad got a phone call from someone in Los Angeles who heard my dad preach at a revival. The person said that he feels he needs to give my father $2000 a month for the next few years.
So when I look at my spiritual life, I see that I am undisciplined and tactless.
I recently read Adam Hamilton's Unleashing the Word and it inspired me to be more prepared for my sermon preparation. And I have. I'm disciplining myself more, and it is showing in me and in our ministry.
I strongly believe that prayer needs to be the most important aspect of my ministry. And I embarrassingly admit that I just don't pray enough.
So for the next 40 days (not including Sundays), with 6 prayer requests, I am heading out to our Early Morning Prayer Service at 530am. Though everything is in Korean, they leave us at least half an hour after the brief message to pray. And in Korean style, everyone prays out loud. You have to experience this to know what I'm talking about.
I went this morning. My body is not used to getting up so early, but it will adjust.
And right now, it's 1230am. I should hurry up and go to bed so that I do not sleep in.
I think this is a good start to becoming more disciplined in my spiritual life.
Monday, April 23, 2007
Friends
I think one of the most frustrating things I've come across is trying to meet up with friends.
The reason it's frustrating is that I want to hang out with them, and see them, but it's just hard to.
I don't think anyone outside of being a pastor, really know how busy a pastor can get in their schedules.
You have people (ignorant ones, might I humbly add) who say, Oh, being a pastor isn't that bad, they only work one day out of the week. (insert groan here.)
I knew I was going to be busy, but I never expected to be this busy.
As soon as one big event is over, we're starting to plan for the next one.
Some times, things get so busy, I lose the sight of God. I always found that ironic, but it happens to many of us quite often.
It's also hard to meet up with people because all my friends have the weekend off, and weekends usually are busier than the rest of the week.
And on Saturdays, I'm reluctant to go out, because I need to just prepare my heart and mind for Sundays.
I'm thankful that I got married before I started full time ministry. I don't know how I'd find the time to date if I weren't.
But you know, I feel as a pastor, I need secular friends. I need friends who are not in the ministry. The friends that I do have in ministry, when we start talking, we start talking about church related things.
Some times, I just need to sit back and complain how the Redskins are screwing things up.
How do other pastors fare in this situation?
Is it because I'm still young that I try to have some life outside of ministry? And I don't mean life outside of ministry meaning that I divulge into debauchery. Although that would be cool... just kidding. I mean just hanging with good friends and not having to discuss what's going on in church. I feel at times I need something like that to keep my sanity.
If it doesn't rain today, I'm going to head out and play basketball with a few of my friends.
I haven't seen any of them for about 2 months now. I'm so paranoid since I've been injured so many times in the past 9 months. Well, 3 times. I went to the ER 3 times in the 9 months. Before that, I've been to the ER 2 in 25 years. If it's even sprinkling, I'm going to have to wait to play basketball. Anyway, I have a long week ahead of me.
Yay.
The reason it's frustrating is that I want to hang out with them, and see them, but it's just hard to.
I don't think anyone outside of being a pastor, really know how busy a pastor can get in their schedules.
You have people (ignorant ones, might I humbly add) who say, Oh, being a pastor isn't that bad, they only work one day out of the week. (insert groan here.)
I knew I was going to be busy, but I never expected to be this busy.
As soon as one big event is over, we're starting to plan for the next one.
Some times, things get so busy, I lose the sight of God. I always found that ironic, but it happens to many of us quite often.
It's also hard to meet up with people because all my friends have the weekend off, and weekends usually are busier than the rest of the week.
And on Saturdays, I'm reluctant to go out, because I need to just prepare my heart and mind for Sundays.
I'm thankful that I got married before I started full time ministry. I don't know how I'd find the time to date if I weren't.
But you know, I feel as a pastor, I need secular friends. I need friends who are not in the ministry. The friends that I do have in ministry, when we start talking, we start talking about church related things.
Some times, I just need to sit back and complain how the Redskins are screwing things up.
How do other pastors fare in this situation?
Is it because I'm still young that I try to have some life outside of ministry? And I don't mean life outside of ministry meaning that I divulge into debauchery. Although that would be cool... just kidding. I mean just hanging with good friends and not having to discuss what's going on in church. I feel at times I need something like that to keep my sanity.
If it doesn't rain today, I'm going to head out and play basketball with a few of my friends.
I haven't seen any of them for about 2 months now. I'm so paranoid since I've been injured so many times in the past 9 months. Well, 3 times. I went to the ER 3 times in the 9 months. Before that, I've been to the ER 2 in 25 years. If it's even sprinkling, I'm going to have to wait to play basketball. Anyway, I have a long week ahead of me.
Yay.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Joel Osteen
What do you think of him, and preachers like him?
I have mixed feelings.
Every Sunday morning, as the wife and I get ready to go to church, I turn the TV on to watch Joel Osteen. I don't know why I started doing this, but it's been about 3 months that I have been doing this.
I just don't know what to make of him and others like him. For me, his messages rarely go deeper than the surface of the scripture that he is using. It's very seeker oriented, but it never seems to have an outlet to go deeper.
But here's the most disturbing thing that I've noticed about his telecast last Sunday.
He doesn't seem to have a cross in the church. Maybe he does and it just doesn't show on the screen, but what I do notice is a big globe rotating in the background.
You may not think it's a big deal, but it struck me a little odd.
And I think that's one problem I have with Seeker Friendly churches. Most of the seeker churches do a good job of providing ways to go deeper in their faith, because one can't always be a seeker.
But a few churches don't provide ways to get deeper, and I feel, at times, they replace the cross with something easier to handle and carry. A church here doesn't have a cross at all, instead they replaced it with a dove.
Sure I may be reading way too much into this, but it just felt odd.
If anyone stops by and reads this, let me know what you think.
I have mixed feelings.
Every Sunday morning, as the wife and I get ready to go to church, I turn the TV on to watch Joel Osteen. I don't know why I started doing this, but it's been about 3 months that I have been doing this.
I just don't know what to make of him and others like him. For me, his messages rarely go deeper than the surface of the scripture that he is using. It's very seeker oriented, but it never seems to have an outlet to go deeper.
But here's the most disturbing thing that I've noticed about his telecast last Sunday.
He doesn't seem to have a cross in the church. Maybe he does and it just doesn't show on the screen, but what I do notice is a big globe rotating in the background.
You may not think it's a big deal, but it struck me a little odd.
And I think that's one problem I have with Seeker Friendly churches. Most of the seeker churches do a good job of providing ways to go deeper in their faith, because one can't always be a seeker.
But a few churches don't provide ways to get deeper, and I feel, at times, they replace the cross with something easier to handle and carry. A church here doesn't have a cross at all, instead they replaced it with a dove.
Sure I may be reading way too much into this, but it just felt odd.
If anyone stops by and reads this, let me know what you think.
Friday, April 13, 2007
Rev. Sharpton and Jackson
Please, please, please for the love of God, go away!
Some times, I wish they were not referred to as "reverends."
Is it just me, or whenever they are "outraged" by certain "injustice" they come to the forefront just for camera time?
Take the latest incident where the "Reverends" are out in the media. They feel that Don Imus went too far for saying the word "ho."
Why are they attacking only Don Imus? Or say, only Michael Richards for the use of the "N" word?
If they find it offensive in one area, then it should be offensive all around.
You can't be offended just because a white person says "ho" to black women. You should be offended when anyone refers to anyone as a "ho."
It seems like when they know the media will run with a story, BOOM, there's Sharpton and Jackson.
Do they even really speak for "Black" America? A lot of black people I know can't stand them.
Here's my biggest problem with them:
Instead of going to where the media is, why not bring the media to them?
What I mean is, instead of charging towards such a minor incident, why not go down to the south and raise awareness for illiteracy? Why not go to the ghettos of America and fight for their rights?
Maybe they do do that. I don't know.
But every time I see either of them on TV, it always seems like they have a hidden agenda which to me is: Everyone look at me!
Some times, I wish they were not referred to as "reverends."
Is it just me, or whenever they are "outraged" by certain "injustice" they come to the forefront just for camera time?
Take the latest incident where the "Reverends" are out in the media. They feel that Don Imus went too far for saying the word "ho."
Why are they attacking only Don Imus? Or say, only Michael Richards for the use of the "N" word?
If they find it offensive in one area, then it should be offensive all around.
You can't be offended just because a white person says "ho" to black women. You should be offended when anyone refers to anyone as a "ho."
It seems like when they know the media will run with a story, BOOM, there's Sharpton and Jackson.
Do they even really speak for "Black" America? A lot of black people I know can't stand them.
Here's my biggest problem with them:
Instead of going to where the media is, why not bring the media to them?
What I mean is, instead of charging towards such a minor incident, why not go down to the south and raise awareness for illiteracy? Why not go to the ghettos of America and fight for their rights?
Maybe they do do that. I don't know.
But every time I see either of them on TV, it always seems like they have a hidden agenda which to me is: Everyone look at me!
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
My Court Date
Earlier this month, I received my first speeding ticket.
But it shouldn't count because it was so unnecessary and unfair.
We were going down this road, which is a downhill.
There were three cars, literally, surrounding me. It's a two lane road, so i had a car in front of me, next to me and behind me. We were ALL going the same speed, which was about 40 mph in a 25 mph zone.
Then at the bottom of the hill, we see two motorcycle cops with laser guns, so naturally all of us slowed down immediately.
As we're passing he signals me to pull over. So I did.
And when i pulled up to him, he asks his partner "Hey, is he the one?" which infuriated me.
I thought, since he wasn't sure and we were all going the same speed, he'd let me off with a warning. Nope.
He gave me a ticket for going 41 in a 25 zone and the ticket came out to 137 dollars.
Great.
So I mailed in the ticket and said I wanted to contest it in person, because i really felt that i was done wrong.
Yesterday at 9am was my court date.
And i had no idea what to expect. This is my first time at court.
It's finally 9, the judge walks in, we all stand up, blah, blah, blah.
Now i'm getting my defense ready.
I was going to tell him that the cop wasn't sure it was me, because he had to ask "Is he the one?" Not only that, but I was going with the flow of traffic.
Any good driver's ed teacher will tell you, it's safer to go with the flow of traffic than it is to obey the speed limit. Accidents happen when drivers go faster or slower than the flow of traffic. So if the flow of traffic is going 40 at a 25 zone, it's safer to go 40.
My name is called up, and I go to the front. He asks me, for the record, to state my name, i do so.
Then he goes over my file and asks, do you admit or deny the charge.
And i had to think. I did go 40, there's no doubt about that.
I told the judge, I admit the charge.
Then he just said, "Okay, since you admitted, i'll knock down you fine. Instead of 41, i'll mark it down to 30 in a 25 zone. Take a seat and wait for your papers."
I ended up paying $25 for the ticket and $47 for court fees, which is still less than 137.
But it got me thinking.
How many times do we justify and find excuses for the things we've done wrong?
I was happy with the decision.
And we should just ask for forgiveness, instead of trying to justify our actions.
But it shouldn't count because it was so unnecessary and unfair.
We were going down this road, which is a downhill.
There were three cars, literally, surrounding me. It's a two lane road, so i had a car in front of me, next to me and behind me. We were ALL going the same speed, which was about 40 mph in a 25 mph zone.
Then at the bottom of the hill, we see two motorcycle cops with laser guns, so naturally all of us slowed down immediately.
As we're passing he signals me to pull over. So I did.
And when i pulled up to him, he asks his partner "Hey, is he the one?" which infuriated me.
I thought, since he wasn't sure and we were all going the same speed, he'd let me off with a warning. Nope.
He gave me a ticket for going 41 in a 25 zone and the ticket came out to 137 dollars.
Great.
So I mailed in the ticket and said I wanted to contest it in person, because i really felt that i was done wrong.
Yesterday at 9am was my court date.
And i had no idea what to expect. This is my first time at court.
It's finally 9, the judge walks in, we all stand up, blah, blah, blah.
Now i'm getting my defense ready.
I was going to tell him that the cop wasn't sure it was me, because he had to ask "Is he the one?" Not only that, but I was going with the flow of traffic.
Any good driver's ed teacher will tell you, it's safer to go with the flow of traffic than it is to obey the speed limit. Accidents happen when drivers go faster or slower than the flow of traffic. So if the flow of traffic is going 40 at a 25 zone, it's safer to go 40.
My name is called up, and I go to the front. He asks me, for the record, to state my name, i do so.
Then he goes over my file and asks, do you admit or deny the charge.
And i had to think. I did go 40, there's no doubt about that.
I told the judge, I admit the charge.
Then he just said, "Okay, since you admitted, i'll knock down you fine. Instead of 41, i'll mark it down to 30 in a 25 zone. Take a seat and wait for your papers."
I ended up paying $25 for the ticket and $47 for court fees, which is still less than 137.
But it got me thinking.
How many times do we justify and find excuses for the things we've done wrong?
I was happy with the decision.
And we should just ask for forgiveness, instead of trying to justify our actions.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Faith
Do you remember the story where Peter walks on water? (or attempts to?)
People often feel that "if Peter had enough faith, he would've been able to walk on water."
Perhaps we should look at it in a different light.
If Peter had enough faith, he would've never stepped out of the boat and onto the water.
He would've believed the statement Jesus made, which was similiar to the "I AM" statement that God made to Moses.
Faith isn't doing something miraculous, or just based on miraculous things happening.
Faith isn't about walking on water, because only God can do that, (Job 9:8; Isa 43:16; 51:9-10 Hab 3:5) for example. (from commentary)
Faith is the ability to believe in the face of all evidence that God is here with me.
So have faith.
Perhaps...
you're barely making ends meet
you're contemplating a future that doesn't seem so bright
you're lost in your life and can't seem to find your way
your family isn't what it should be
your family is falling apart
you have a medical problem
We all face storms that will rock the little boats that we are riding. Some of us are in the midst of a storm, and it doesn't seem like it's going to let up any time soon.
But have faith. As Jesus was with his disciples through both storms in the sea, God is with you. God is for you. And God loves you.
I wrote that a long time ago.
Today, I came across it again.
I needed to read that.
It's amazing of how quickly I can forget that God is with me.
Do not be anxious in anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7
People often feel that "if Peter had enough faith, he would've been able to walk on water."
Perhaps we should look at it in a different light.
If Peter had enough faith, he would've never stepped out of the boat and onto the water.
He would've believed the statement Jesus made, which was similiar to the "I AM" statement that God made to Moses.
Faith isn't doing something miraculous, or just based on miraculous things happening.
Faith isn't about walking on water, because only God can do that, (Job 9:8; Isa 43:16; 51:9-10 Hab 3:5) for example. (from commentary)
Faith is the ability to believe in the face of all evidence that God is here with me.
So have faith.
Perhaps...
you're barely making ends meet
you're contemplating a future that doesn't seem so bright
you're lost in your life and can't seem to find your way
your family isn't what it should be
your family is falling apart
you have a medical problem
We all face storms that will rock the little boats that we are riding. Some of us are in the midst of a storm, and it doesn't seem like it's going to let up any time soon.
But have faith. As Jesus was with his disciples through both storms in the sea, God is with you. God is for you. And God loves you.
I wrote that a long time ago.
Today, I came across it again.
I needed to read that.
It's amazing of how quickly I can forget that God is with me.
Do not be anxious in anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Growing Up
Today I found out that my friend got engaged to her long time boyfriend. In December, another friend got engaged to her long time boyfriend. Three of my friends are married now. We're growing up. And fast, it seems like.
It's was like yesterday (and i can't believe i'm using that phrase...) that i just moved to Mililani and i was trying my best to make good friends that'll last a long time. And i have. We were silly and goofy high school kids doing high school stuff. Now we no longer live in the safety cushion of high school. We don't have college over our heads. It's finally the real world.
My best friend is heading out to Seattle to pursue a full-time career in nursing, and maybe traveling around the world in that field.
I have a friend who started his own local business in the music industry. And from what i've seen, he's successful. He got to hang out at Jack Johnson's house(!!!!).
It's only a matter of time before my other friends get engaged. One's living in New York and seems likely to head to a career in the military.
Life does come at you fast, doesn't?
Yesterday we were worrying about what to wear to school, to look cool, to be cool, to trying to see if the girl you like liked you back.
Today, we are worrying about bills, making sure we don't fail, getting jobs that will be our careers.
And for me? I want kids. I know it's not a competition or anything, but i would to be the first of my friends to have a kid. That way my kid can bully all the rest of em. (heh).
Times sure have changed.
I remember how i wanted to be so much older when i was young. I wanted to be an adult, and quick.
Now that i am an adult, sometimes i wish i was a kid again.
Time is funny.
They said that there is no better teacher then Time. Time is the greatest teacher. But Time kills all of her students.
It's was like yesterday (and i can't believe i'm using that phrase...) that i just moved to Mililani and i was trying my best to make good friends that'll last a long time. And i have. We were silly and goofy high school kids doing high school stuff. Now we no longer live in the safety cushion of high school. We don't have college over our heads. It's finally the real world.
My best friend is heading out to Seattle to pursue a full-time career in nursing, and maybe traveling around the world in that field.
I have a friend who started his own local business in the music industry. And from what i've seen, he's successful. He got to hang out at Jack Johnson's house(!!!!).
It's only a matter of time before my other friends get engaged. One's living in New York and seems likely to head to a career in the military.
Life does come at you fast, doesn't?
Yesterday we were worrying about what to wear to school, to look cool, to be cool, to trying to see if the girl you like liked you back.
Today, we are worrying about bills, making sure we don't fail, getting jobs that will be our careers.
And for me? I want kids. I know it's not a competition or anything, but i would to be the first of my friends to have a kid. That way my kid can bully all the rest of em. (heh).
Times sure have changed.
I remember how i wanted to be so much older when i was young. I wanted to be an adult, and quick.
Now that i am an adult, sometimes i wish i was a kid again.
Time is funny.
They said that there is no better teacher then Time. Time is the greatest teacher. But Time kills all of her students.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Leave 99...
In the Bible, Jesus tells a parable of how the shepherd would leave 99 sheep behind to find the one that wandered away.
And i feel that thought should be applied into ministry. But how much easier said than done it is. We have a group of college boys that have all the potential in the world. They would apply themselves more in church and into our ministry, but they don't want to seem weak (or whatever) in front of the others. They're waiting for one of them to make the move into becoming a serious Christian, then the rest will follow suit. But it's not going to happen. When they're alone, it'll be easier for them to open up, but when they're together, they just front.
So i decided it's time to go and actively "pursue" these guys, meaning, just hang out on a one-on-one basis and get to know them more and encourage them to come to the young adult service instead of the youth and to attend young adult bible studies.
When i saw the need to do this, i was surprised of how... inconvenient it all was. I honestly don't want to do it. I feel like i have too much other things that i need to do, like find a retreat site for our young adult summer retreat... (which is now getting more impossible) or like trying to figure out what to do for a mission trip this summer (and i'm running out of time). Not to mention the regular hustle and flow of church work. It just seems like i have million other things to do then try to reach out to a bunch of college boys.
How wrong is that?
In thinking like that, i forgot one of the most important part of being a pastor (at least for me): tending souls. Who cares if we don't get a site for the summer retreat? We'll improvise. If i don't get a mission trip planned, the church isn't going to fire me. But if i get one, just one of these boys to open up their hearts for Christ... that i feel is what God would want me to do...
On top of that, i can't help but think of times when i strayed away...
The image of the shepherd leaving the 99 to find the one has become more powerful to me, only because i realize how hard it really is... and how "inconvenient" in can seem to be. And it shows how much we are loved by our Creator.
And i feel that thought should be applied into ministry. But how much easier said than done it is. We have a group of college boys that have all the potential in the world. They would apply themselves more in church and into our ministry, but they don't want to seem weak (or whatever) in front of the others. They're waiting for one of them to make the move into becoming a serious Christian, then the rest will follow suit. But it's not going to happen. When they're alone, it'll be easier for them to open up, but when they're together, they just front.
So i decided it's time to go and actively "pursue" these guys, meaning, just hang out on a one-on-one basis and get to know them more and encourage them to come to the young adult service instead of the youth and to attend young adult bible studies.
When i saw the need to do this, i was surprised of how... inconvenient it all was. I honestly don't want to do it. I feel like i have too much other things that i need to do, like find a retreat site for our young adult summer retreat... (which is now getting more impossible) or like trying to figure out what to do for a mission trip this summer (and i'm running out of time). Not to mention the regular hustle and flow of church work. It just seems like i have million other things to do then try to reach out to a bunch of college boys.
How wrong is that?
In thinking like that, i forgot one of the most important part of being a pastor (at least for me): tending souls. Who cares if we don't get a site for the summer retreat? We'll improvise. If i don't get a mission trip planned, the church isn't going to fire me. But if i get one, just one of these boys to open up their hearts for Christ... that i feel is what God would want me to do...
On top of that, i can't help but think of times when i strayed away...
The image of the shepherd leaving the 99 to find the one has become more powerful to me, only because i realize how hard it really is... and how "inconvenient" in can seem to be. And it shows how much we are loved by our Creator.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Affirmation
Today, i was unpacking and i came across the scrap book my kids at KUMC of GW gave to me as when i was moving back to Hawaii.
When i first read it, it made me cry with the letters and words those kids said to me.
I read it once more when i arrived in Hawaii, and it again moved me to tears.
I haven't looked at it since, until today.
I looked through it, read all the things the kids wrote to me.
It didn't make me sad as it once did.
It did, however, bring in a sense of relief.
I doubted so many times during my years there that i was actually doing something good. I never felt i was accomplished enough, never felt i was doing the right thing (which is how i still feel.)
I spent countless of hours trying to help them, and i never felt i was reaching them, let alone helping them.
Some times, I thought of quitting.
Many times i felt (and still feel) that the call from God is far greater than i could ever handle.
3 years of my life was spent pouring out my life to these kids.
And by the grace of God, and through God, i touched the lives of those young people. Those words of affirmation were great to read. And it reminded me, no matter how or incompetent i feel, that God uses the weak to lead the strong. As long as i continue to press on, God will work through me and for me.
I do what's possible and God will take care of the impossible. We're a tag team like that. (hehe.)
Ministry is such a thankless career choice. We don't know how we're affecting the lives of the people we serve. When we give all we have to the people we serve, sometimes we don't receive the thanks that we may feel we deserve.
But that's not why we do these things.
We don't store our treasures here on earth,
but we store them in heaven.
I do this for God.
I do this to serve God, and therefore serve the people that God has entrusted in my care.
Though people may never thank me for the work i may do, that doesn't (and shouldn't) bother me and i don't seek the approval of people.
My aim and purpose is to bring people closer to God and help them along their walk with their faith.
While it's nice to hear thank yous and what not, but in the end, more than any thank yous to people i served and touched, what i want to hear the most is "well done, my good and faithful son, well done." And that is what i strive for.
When i first read it, it made me cry with the letters and words those kids said to me.
I read it once more when i arrived in Hawaii, and it again moved me to tears.
I haven't looked at it since, until today.
I looked through it, read all the things the kids wrote to me.
It didn't make me sad as it once did.
It did, however, bring in a sense of relief.
I doubted so many times during my years there that i was actually doing something good. I never felt i was accomplished enough, never felt i was doing the right thing (which is how i still feel.)
I spent countless of hours trying to help them, and i never felt i was reaching them, let alone helping them.
Some times, I thought of quitting.
Many times i felt (and still feel) that the call from God is far greater than i could ever handle.
3 years of my life was spent pouring out my life to these kids.
And by the grace of God, and through God, i touched the lives of those young people. Those words of affirmation were great to read. And it reminded me, no matter how or incompetent i feel, that God uses the weak to lead the strong. As long as i continue to press on, God will work through me and for me.
I do what's possible and God will take care of the impossible. We're a tag team like that. (hehe.)
Ministry is such a thankless career choice. We don't know how we're affecting the lives of the people we serve. When we give all we have to the people we serve, sometimes we don't receive the thanks that we may feel we deserve.
But that's not why we do these things.
We don't store our treasures here on earth,
but we store them in heaven.
I do this for God.
I do this to serve God, and therefore serve the people that God has entrusted in my care.
Though people may never thank me for the work i may do, that doesn't (and shouldn't) bother me and i don't seek the approval of people.
My aim and purpose is to bring people closer to God and help them along their walk with their faith.
While it's nice to hear thank yous and what not, but in the end, more than any thank yous to people i served and touched, what i want to hear the most is "well done, my good and faithful son, well done." And that is what i strive for.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Where the Grass is Green
So every Wednesday (so far this year) i've been sitting at Starbucks getting work done before our Wednesday service begins. The Starbucks is right across the street from the church, so it's convenient. I invite the kids to come and study with me, and so far only one has taken up on that offer. It's better that way, because then i get work done. And the youth that comes in, he's quite introverted, so he just sits there and does his work. I once in a while interrupt him to see what he's working on and how he's doing. I like it better this way.
So i was reading my friend's blog and she was writing about the "Secret."
And i posted a comment, but it got me thinking.
We are very jealous and envious creatures. I guess that's why Jesus tells us to guard our hearts against all kinds of greed.
I notice how it seeps into pastors and ministries.
Too many pastors put emphasis on the size of their ministry: The size of the church building, the size of the budget, the size of the members. For a church to be successful, it seems like it has to be big. (I don't think a church should be defined as "successful" in my opinion. I like the term "effective. But that's just me.)
When the church across from you is blessed with a revival and growth, it's easy to get envious of that church and that pastor. It's easy to say, what is she doing that i'm not? What's he got that i don't? And then it's easy to think, well if i had what she has, i'd be just as effective...
I think that's why so many people just end up leaving churches for others.
We compare with other churches, and see what that church has to offer compared to the current church.
That church has a lot of people, and this one doesn't, i think i fit better with that church.
This church has some political problems, that church seems to get along, i'd better switch.
But we never realize that when we move to a different church or a different job, we switch old problems with new ones. We turn in one set of problems at the old site only to receive a whole new set at the new site.
It's sad how we can't be happy with what we have. And i speak for me too.
We always want something newer, something bigger and something faster. The problem with that is, the new gets old and there's always going to be something bigger and faster.
Too many times we count what we don't have, and we missed how blessed we truly are.
And when we have God, God is more than enough.
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want.
And how true are those words. When we have God in our lives, what more could we ask for?
We always think that the grass is greener on the other side.
But the truth is, the grass is greener where we water it.
(Thoughts from Max Lucado and Doug Fields are interwoven with my thoughts on this post. Just thought I'd let you know.)
So i was reading my friend's blog and she was writing about the "Secret."
And i posted a comment, but it got me thinking.
We are very jealous and envious creatures. I guess that's why Jesus tells us to guard our hearts against all kinds of greed.
I notice how it seeps into pastors and ministries.
Too many pastors put emphasis on the size of their ministry: The size of the church building, the size of the budget, the size of the members. For a church to be successful, it seems like it has to be big. (I don't think a church should be defined as "successful" in my opinion. I like the term "effective. But that's just me.)
When the church across from you is blessed with a revival and growth, it's easy to get envious of that church and that pastor. It's easy to say, what is she doing that i'm not? What's he got that i don't? And then it's easy to think, well if i had what she has, i'd be just as effective...
I think that's why so many people just end up leaving churches for others.
We compare with other churches, and see what that church has to offer compared to the current church.
That church has a lot of people, and this one doesn't, i think i fit better with that church.
This church has some political problems, that church seems to get along, i'd better switch.
But we never realize that when we move to a different church or a different job, we switch old problems with new ones. We turn in one set of problems at the old site only to receive a whole new set at the new site.
It's sad how we can't be happy with what we have. And i speak for me too.
We always want something newer, something bigger and something faster. The problem with that is, the new gets old and there's always going to be something bigger and faster.
Too many times we count what we don't have, and we missed how blessed we truly are.
And when we have God, God is more than enough.
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want.
And how true are those words. When we have God in our lives, what more could we ask for?
We always think that the grass is greener on the other side.
But the truth is, the grass is greener where we water it.
(Thoughts from Max Lucado and Doug Fields are interwoven with my thoughts on this post. Just thought I'd let you know.)
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